I am not a hardcore feminist, but I do have a healthy dose of self-respect as a woman. While I sometimes disagree with the points and arguments put forth in Kate Harding's Shapely Prose, the women there are usually on the ball and are often much more articulate about stating things that make me so pissed off I can't form a coherent thought, let alone write a readable post. I strongly recommend the two recent-ish posts, "Guest Blogger Starling: Schrödinger’s Rapist: or a guy’s guide to approaching strange women without being maced" and the slightly earlier post, "Would it kill you to be civil?"
Why do I think you should read these? Firstly, because Guest Blogger Starling's post is one of the most balanced, sensible, non-judgemental and well-written pieces I've read that explains to guys why a lot of women are a little jumpy at best when being approached by strange men. In my experience, men and women tend to think differently and apporach social situations differently. Now, factor in that a good 75-80% of LARP guys are pretty socially awkward on some level (and I'm being generous here), and while I believe that the majority of them are not necessarily dangerous and do not have any kind of malicious intent, they can still come off as kind of annoying, creepy, or scary, all without meaning to. They're just that clueless and/or awkward. Although I rather wish that the author gave the sources for her statistics, they are fairly sobering but not the most extreme I've ever heard, and at the very least it'll give you some good ammo for explaining to that ardent but unnerving suitor why stalking you through the woods OOG is really not going to be his best approach to getting a date with you.
Secondly, the second post hits a bit closer to the mark. Now, I know you've all met these guys: they're nice enough; maybe not the best looking but not grossly deformed; ranging in conversational skills from being tolerable to talk to, to really comfortable and fun to be around, most of the time. every now and then however, they say something that makes you feel a little odd--a little sad, a little guilty, a lot of uncomfortable. They're the ones that will drop the odd self-pitying statement at slightly weird points in conversation. The second post I listed explains the Self-Pitying GeekTM's lament in more feminist terms than I would generally adhere to, but you'll get the gist of it.
The Self-Pitying GeekTM and the Nice GuyTM will both be featured in posts of their own in the future.
The Self-Pitying GeekTM and the Nice GuyTM will both be featured in posts of their own in the future.
